Personal Trainers that suck (Part 5)


The Always has you warm up for 5-10 minutes walking on the treadmill trainer.  The trainer is off the hook if you showed up early and decided to get a few minutes on the cardio equipment.  The trainers that have you walk for 5 minutes on a treadmill before working on your chest/tricep muscles are wasting time on a “warm-up” that prepares the wrong systems for work.  I’m 99.999% sure that is NOT the way they warm-up.  It is however a great way to kill a few minutes off your session or sneak in a bathroom break/snack break, text/tweet/FB post.


“This stretches your legs  (and gives me a chance to deactivate my glutes)”

The Doesn’t know how to stretch muscles beyond the ones you learned how to stretch in gym class trainer.  This indicates several possible things: 

(1) The trainer skipped the anatomy section of their certification process (not likely)

(2) The trainer doesn’t see value in flexibility training (possible, especially in younger/limited skills trainers

(3) The trainer hasn’t evolved.

(4) The trainer doesn’t care.


The BS’s with other trainers during your session trainer.  BS…not consult on something that is directly related to you, or related to the safety of someone else around you.


The BS’s with other gym go’ers during your session trainer.  Once again, this has been known to happen. 


The Salesman/Trainer Trainer.   Pushing you into upgrading personal training contracts, upgrades, buying shake weights, purchasing supplements and anything else with all the tact of a telemarketer.


“Don’t be a wuss!  Are you a wuss? No? Fine! Prove it…look at the weight and tell it to Come at Me Bro!…DO IT!!! DO IT NOWWWWWW!!!!!”

The Bully Trainer.  This was the guy that made fun of you in high school, now he/she is in charge of putting you through exercises. 


The Bully trainers female counterpart is The Mean Girl trainer.


The D-Bag Trainer.  This is the one that spends more time telling you how great they are and checking themselves in the mirror frequently.


The Ringmaster Trainer.  They LOVE getting you on that BOSU ball to perform all sorts of single leg tricks with weights.  (Exception: You are training to become a juggler that specializes in performing at sea in high waves.)  Balance training itself is not a bad thing, it is when it is the ONLY thing that you are doing that have a problem.


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